That’s not very clever, girl.
Artist: Jason Newman
Condition: lacking for a better word
Product: American Apparel – 1 Baby Blue Woot Tee
Description: “What’s their growth rate?” They’re lethal at eight months, and I do mean lethal: deadly, baleful, dangerous, deathly, destructive, fatal, malignant, pernicious, mortiferous- “I get it.” I’ve hunted most things that can hunt you, but the way these things moveâ€¦it’s astonishing, bewildering, impressive, stupefying, dumbfounding, staggering- “Okay, okay. Are they fast for a biped?” Cheetah speed. Fifty, sixty miles an hour if they ever got out into the open, absconded, bailed out, bolted, cut and run, decamped, fled, played hooky- “Yeah, I see your meaning.” They’re astonishing jumpers. “…” What? “Well? Aren’t you going to leap into a succession of synonyms for “astonishing?” I already did that one. “Ugh, fine. Do they show intelligence?” They show extraordinary intelligence. “…” No, I feel like “astonishing” covers that, too. Anyway, when the big one came in she took over the pride and killed all but two of the others. That oneâ€¦when she looks at you, you can tell she’s working things out, percolating, mulling over, musing, ruminating, speculating, deliberating, chewing over- “Holy CRAP I cannot wait for you to get eaten.” Wear this shirt: If you want to strike up a conversation with your English teacher. Don’t wear this shirt: If you already get picked on for being brainy. This shirt tells the world: “SHOOT HER! BLAST HER! UNLEASH A BARRAGE UPON HER! FIRE ON HER! LET FLY YOUR BULLETS IN HER DIRECTION! PULL THE TRIGGER WHILE AIMING YOUR FIREARM AT HER! MURDER HER!” We call this color: Something More Creative Than Just “Baby Blue”
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